Ever have one of those weeks where it seems like death is just all around you?
It has been a long week and a sad week.
First, it felt like Hurricane Dorian would never leave. It tortured many of us on the East Coast. And the devastation in the Bahamas is still coming to light day after day. Then it hit the Carolinas and parts of us in Virginia and continued to make its way up North wreaking havoc in Nova Scotia. The destruction and heartbreak caused by one storm has felt overwhelming.
Suicide Awareness Day was this week. We lost a very influential and special man in the Christian world this week to suicide. His name is Jarrid Wilson and he was a pastor from Harvest Christian Fellowship in California. He openly struggled with depression and was an advocate for getting help. I read an article this week about the epidemic of suicide in the veterinary field of work. How depressing their line of work is and how they are killing themselves to escape the pain they experience. As the wife of a Veteran I know how many Vets commit suicide every day. Suicide is all around us and I have been personally impacted by suicide.
September 11th was remembered this week. Patriot Day is a day that many younger people do not know the signifigance of but I am old enough to remember and I will continue to teach, honor and remember so that those people have their heroism remembered. The pictures, stories and videos that surface every time around this year serve as a reminder not just of death but also of triumph and of a time when we came together as a country to stand strong and support each other.
Something else that happened this week, on a personal level, was making the decision to say goodbye to our sweet boy Julius. He was a 13 year old Chihuahua and we had him before we had kids! Unfortunately, his health had declined too much that it became selfish for us to keep him here. His quality of life had deteriorated beyond any help we could give him. He lived an amazing life and overcame incredible odds from the time he was born. He went through deployments with me, sickness with me, bringing home babies with me. Julius saw it all! I will miss him very much.
Like I said, it felt like death was all around me this week. It would have been easy to get swept up in it all. The sadness, the questions, the what ifs, the whys, the when is it over Lord! But I was able to remain constant.
Of course, I was sad. There were times I was utterly Heart Broken.
Through it all I was able to remain hopeful that another day was coming. Healing was coming, help was coming, peace was already here, and I wasn't alone. I can only contribute this to my walk with Jesus.
In my bio, This is Us, I am honest about my walk with Him. I have not always walked with Jesus. I have been far from constant during these times. I relied on other sources to find that peace, to find that comfort, to find the answers that I did not know. If I would have had a week like this even 5 years ago I can't positively say that I would not have crumbled in one way or another.
I am who I am today because of my journey. I am who I am today because God has kept me safe through it all. I am who I am because I love Him right now this very moment and I am forgiven and washed clean!
Believing in God and walking with Jesus are extremely important to me. Another piece of the puzzle is friends and doing life together. Loneliness is an epidemic. So if you feel lonely I encourage you to reach out to people and talk, share your life, and share your heart. You will be surprised at how many people around you have the same fears, feelings and thoughts as you! I am praying for you this week!
If you are need help or feel alone please reach out to the crisis line 800-273-TALK(8255)
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