There have been a lot of questions lately swirling in my mind.
We have been living the full time RV life 5 months now. This is plenty of time to see the effects, good and bad on our family as a whole and as individuals. This brings to light positives and negatives. As a parent, the responsibility for little lives is intense!
And so the questions, the thoughts, the prayers, begin to swirl.
This can be very overwhelming at times! It is so easy to love and want something so badly that you tend to overlook the little things that you shouldn't be avoiding. The things that you keep telling yourself will work out, or will pass in time or just need a little longer adjusting period.
I know not all of you that read this blogs follow our Instagram account. I have been open about these struggles in more detail there but nonetheless the questioning and wondering takes over often and more often than not I find my only answer to be in constant prayer.
While I see no benefit in simply rambling about what those struggles are here at this point in time I did have something come across my heart today that I knew I must share because I knew without a doubt it came from the Holy Spirit. Where there is no confusion attached it is definitely a gift from my Heavenly Father.
To make a bit more sense of my ramblings, I am going to back it up just a little. Today is Veteran's Day. And my incredible husband is among the best of the best who sacrificed years to serve our country. As I was reading through post after post on Facebook of my friends thanking their husbands, it dawned on me that when I think about Zach these days, soldier isn't the first thing that comes to mind anymore.
You see, he's been retired several years now, and even though he will always be a veteran, in my eyes he is so much more.
His identity is not a veteran. It is not a soldier. His identity is a child of God. He is a man who seeks after Christ and a relationship with Him. Zach is an incredible loving husband and a patient loving father. But those are not his identity either. He is a pastor that counsels and helps people. But these are simply positions or roles God has given us as gifts or jobs to have and accomplish while here on earth.
Now that my husband is no longer activity duty does that mean his identity is gone or changed? He was given no choice in retirement, does that mean his identity was stripped? What if he suddenly wasn't a dad or a husband? Or a brother or a son? Think of all the "roles" we play in our lives.
How many times have I taken one of these roles or responsibilities that God has given me and turned it into an identity?
And then I have given myself a failing grade because I do not do my identity right! Or I have crashed and burned because suddenly my "identity" is gone. These "roles" come and go. So, does my identity come and go? Am I constantly changing WHO I AM as the years go by? That seems like SO MUCH WORK, am I right!?
So here's the simple truth.... My only identity is that I am a child of God. I am wholly and completely loved, just as I am.
Yes, this world full of unexpected crappy situations throws curve balls at us all the time. Things can change in a moments notice. We can go from being happy to grieving, and back again before we've had time to process what caused it all.
But none of that needs to shake who I am. None of that needs to shake who we are. My identity is never in question. Your identity is never in question. Our identity is never changing. We are steadfast because we are children of God.
Whatever is swirling around in your head. Whatever the questioning that is taking place. Whatever the many prayers that are being whispered and cried out. Whatever the situation, there is one thing that remains without question.....
We are made in the image of God. Our identity is in Him. Nothing can change that.
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