Worship is my weapon. Praise makes the darkness flee. Warfare is real.
Music is to my soul like a deep breath is to my lungs. The Holy Spirit uses the lyrics of a song to fill my mind with the prayers I can't seem to form on my own.
Lyrics like "there is another in the fire, standing next to me"
As you know, my health has been rocked the last few months. I had to become a hermit in my own home just to survive. That was overwhelming at times. And lonely at times. BUT Jesus was in the fire with me. He was right there feeling it all and sharing the burden. Worshiping Him and praising Him is the way to battle through. I could feel Him there with me.
Lyrics like "there was another in the waters, holding back the seas"
It felt like I was drowning but I wasn't. He is here and He continues to hold back the waters. As I continue to praise Him through this storm Jesus never lets my head stay under, He continues to chase away the negative thoughts and the despair.
Lyrics like "it may look like I'm surrounded but I'm surrounded by You"
I can't tell you how many times I would whisper these words over and over with tears streaming down my face. When I think about how many times I was surrounded by darkness and pain it felt like there was no way to survive but then I would remember that I am also surrounded by God and that means a peace only He can bring.
Lyrics like "You turn mourning to dancing, You give beauty for ashes, You turn shame into glory"
Mourning to dancing! What a thought. I have rolled these lyrics over and over in my mind as well as the scriptures they come from. How I couldn't wait to be dancing again! Beauty for ashes is one of my favorite phrases in Isaiah! Oh and shame into glory...who would have thought that migraines could bring such shame. Of course everyone has been very gracious but in my mind I think of all things I can't do, am not doing, should be doing, and have missed. Regardless, these lyrics remind me that God is above all this and he turns my worries into prayers and my burdens into conversations. And when I am well enough I will do all the things again.
Lyrics like "You turn graves into gardens, You're the only One who can"
It felt like I was in a grave. At times it would have been easier to be in a grave. But God knows better. He has equipped doctors that know better and prayer warriors that know better and He assures me that He knows better. He's the only one who can tell me that He will heal me and deliver me and I believe Him.
It's been 3 months since we started the battle against the return of my migraines. I can finally say I am getting better! I can definitely say I feel better! I don't have to hide out in my room all day. I don't have to wear sunglasses in the house. I don't have to tell my kids I can't go outside with them. I don't have to say no to movie nights.
I am not 100%.... but I can confidently say not YET! I still have occasional migraines and I still talk to my doctor every other week and we are still adjusting meds, running tests and taking blood and more blood. BUT progress is still beautiful progress. And I see a light getting bigger and bigger pushing out the darkness.
Praise God and Thank you Jesus!
Side note: it's funny how people disappear when you aren't the one reaching out all the time! However, I am sooooo grateful to everyone else that has texted, called, prayed, messaged, emailed, and LOVED on my family.
+YOU ARE THE HANDS AND FEET OF JESUS+
Comments